AGING

It crept up on me

I was young

Supple

Slim

Somewhat of a brat

Thoughtless

Cokes after school

At Dake’s drugstore

Flirting with boys

Before I could catch my breath

I was married

On a hot day

Wearing a borrowed wedding dress

That I hated

Fast forward to a different husband

A daughter

Dream come true

A daughter I could name after my dead mother

A son

Along the way

Lots of lovers

None of them quite the One

Although each time I hoped

Finally

Son and daughter grown and gone

Where did they go?

Recognition

He’s the One

We moved west together

Who am I?

Where do I belong?

Who is this woman with wrinkled arms and legs and face?

Who is this woman with more gray than black in her hair?

Body hasn’t been slim for years

So many things I can no longer do

Cartwheels, handstands, backbends

Full lotus

I am bound by regrets

For the foolish things like cartwheels

That I don’t do

Then I berate myself for

Regretting the smooth skin

I tell myself to be grateful

For my good health

For the many things my body can do

I tell myself to be grateful

For so many many joys

Son and daughter

Grandchildren

Great  grand children

They’re far away

These great-grandchildren

They don’t know me

I don’t know them

My fourth husband is aging

His body is compromised

Heart, kidneys, prostrate

They don’t work all that well

He’s had to have several teeth removed

I don’t hear so well

I’m considering a hearing aid

If I start to wear a hearing aid

I’ll know I’m no longer young.

I’m sorry God

I’m sorry that I’m not more grateful

For what I do have

The brain still works fairly well

Although I forget more and more words

They sit on the tip of my tongue

The weird thing is

I’m happier now than when I was

Supple, smooth and slim

I no longer have days and days

Of deep depression

I no longer have nights and nights

Of desperation

I’m trying God

I’m trying to accept

The aging process

I’m trying to

Grow old with grace

Humor, and gratitude